Just when you thought no one could know you better than yourself, along comes 23andMe who tout themselves as “the first Personal Genome Service”. Basically, for $1000 they will have you spit in a plastic tube, then send that sample to their labs where crazy smart folks will unlock the secrets of your DNA.

So, what do you do with the information they decipher? Well, you get an Odds Calculator that tries to tell you what kind of health conditions you may be susceptible to, only good for those who don’t like surprises – you read the end of the story first; you get a Global Similarity tool to help trace your ancestry back to the apes; then there’s the GrandTree, where you can investigate how all your shortcomings can be blamed on your parents genetics! Awesome! I must admit I am equal parts intriqued and disgusted by this commercialization of our most private information. Sure, it would be information that could incredibly useful, but really now…doesn’t it creep you out to know things which should probably never be revealed? A quick scan through WebMD and you instantly get symptoms for a myraid of medical conditions. What do you think will creep into your psyche once you read through your friggin DNA?! Yipes! That be the stuff of nightmares my friends! So, follow through at your own risk.

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